Thursday, October 29, 2009

My Journaling Journey Starts here...

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you,not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11 Hello Bloggers, Friends, Family! I am finally starting a blog... I have been apprehensive to do so because I felt if it wasn't perfect, I wasn't gonna do it. Well, Nothing is ever perfect so here it goes!! One of the main reasons I wanted to start this is because I wanted to show, and tell you how being diagnosed with type 1 diabetes is for me. I am learning and its a new journey..it hasn't been easy. I am not 100% sure how this is going to go, but I feel strongly this is where I start! Today marks 3 weeks that I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. The day it all went down was Oct 8,2009. I made an appt with the Dr. b/c I thought I probably had the flu..The six days before that was awful, I was so thirsty, tired, could barely pick up my daughter, and I even lost about 6-8 lbs. Which by the way, was happy about--I would eat like a pig and still loose weight on the scale-- So that Thurs, I went in and the Dr wanted to do some blood work so we did.. **Mind you, we were supposed to leave for our first (the hubs and I-ALONE) vacation with some of our best friends to Chicago on the 9th(tickets purchased, hotels booked, clothes picked out!!) to support their love of running (ran Chicago 26.2 mi Marathon); and just some R&R for us. ** I received a call from a Dr at the lab and I distinctly remember I was disoriented because when he asked for Naomi, I said hold on and then he said, "ma'mm your test results came back and your blood sugar is 430 (normal is between 80-120)." I said, "And so what does that mean? I am leaving for Chicago tomorrow and This needs to be fixed, what do I do?" He said, "Well you might be a diabetic (at that moment-I freaked and started crying and thinking, nooo how could this be!!); and you need to go to the ER. So Justin had our friends(thx Jason and Renee) come stay with the kids and took me to the hospital. I was, let me tell you, A HOT MESS! They couldn't get a reading on the machine that measures your sugar, so they drew blood, and results came back at 830+. So I am crying so much and asking if I will get to go home so I can get packed to leave for our vacation. They start me on an insulin drip, drawing more blood, pricking my finger, taking my blood pressure(which was low, yeah I know A HOT MESS!), Then also telling me I have abnormal thyroid test. I am thinking GREAT! this is so awesome! I get to stay in the hospital, get diabetes, miss my fun trip with my husband, and look like a freak with swollen eyes from crying. YEAH RIGHT! Justin was the most incredible support!, stroking my hand, kissed me, and told me everything happens for a reason. YEAH that became the THEME of the night and next couple of days! So yeah I may be joking about it, but I knew it was a God thing I didn't go, something could've really went wrong..if I ignored how I was feeling. So I got wheeled up to ICU, and my room was huge and I had the two most loving and incredible Nurses! I shared with them how I was feeling,(if you know me, I wear my emotions where everyone can see them) recited the THEME (everything happens for a reason) of the night, and told them my faith in my God is stronger then to let this be my downfall! One of my nurses gave me a scripture and wrote it on the board for me to see, "...With MAN this is Impossible, but with God All things are possible." Matthew 19:26 Of course I was welling up again-God spoke to me through her! I knew it because that scripture applied to other areas in my life as well. Justin spent the night with me, I didn't really sleep. They pricked my fingers every 30 min, adjusted the insulin drip-surprisingly my sugar dropped really quick-so they took me off that. The Dr. came in at like 2am (I was thrilled) and she was super sweet and just told me I was a diabetic most likely caused by a virus(surprising I know, but it's quite common) gave me some info on how to count my carbs when I eat out! She was great, I was just overwhelmed. It was hard for me to soak all this in. Really hard. I've never had any health issues prior to this. My brother is also a type 1 but he became one when he was 12, and no one else in my family has diabetes. I just couldn't believe what was going on. The next day I was overwhelmed with soo much love! I received calls, and great friends visited me. I received beautiful flowers (love you guys), cards, sugar free candy(that was a first) and just the presence of my loved ones gave me comfort. I definitely needed all that love! I cried and laughed a lot with my friends and family. God showered me with LOVE AND COMFORT! I was blessed in the midst of a raging battle resounding in my head," you are a prisoner to a chronic illness for the rest of your life, you will never be the same again, always one who people think, Oh she's sickly, people will feel sorry for you, blah blah blah!!" Just as much as those lies were in my head, I had people speaking LIFE in me, encouraging me, giving me scripture to fill me up and stomp on the devil's face! "Praise be to the Lord my ROCK, who trains my hands for war, my fingers for battle." Psalms 144:1 "Finally. BE strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devils schemes." Ephesians 6:10-11 I had to start giving myself shots on Friday. THAT was hard. They showed me, told me to do it at a 45 degree angle so it doesn't hurt as much. It wasn't that hard for me at first with a nurse right there with me. But Idk, I think I developed anxiety over doing it. I started freakin out a little when it was shot time..AHHH! Saturday, the day I was discharged, I had a fit right before I had to leave. I could NOT give myself the shot. The nurse, Justin, and I had a good laugh because I cursed about it while crying..saying a few vulgar words--then I sucked it up and did it! The nurse was so sweet, she gave me a hug and told me I'll get the hang of it. So prescriptions in hand, I got a free wheel chair ride down to my car. We loaded up and left the hospital where my life changed forever. So--the last few weeks have been a true test for me. Without My Faith in my Saviour, I would be the WORST HOT MESS YOU EVER SEEN! I know this didn't happened to me b/c God did it, it's life and the enemy is always looking to kill, steal, and destroy people. "It's not who you are inside that defines you, it's what you do that defines you."--Batman II--its true humor and all-- Life is a choice and attitude is everything. I am sooo imperfect, I have my flaws, and my days-just ask my husband, my sister, my dad, and best friends.. but as much as life throws at me and knocks me down, I WILL get up, dust my butt off and stay on the path that leads me to my Creator. So in closing, I am looking fwd to share my journey with you. I will be posting some blogs about the things I have experienced the last few weeks, for now I thank you for taking time to read about me! ******Thank you Amanda for helping me set this up, you ROCK!************** <---The night I was admitted to ICU..hooked up to an insulin drip,fluid to keep me hydrated,heart monitors..etc. I was full of so many emotions, had cried for hours, I'm surprised I smiled! " A raw image of giving myself insulin shots 4x's a day...sometimes more.. and below is a visual of about how many needles used since I came home Saturday Oct 10, 2009.

Looking at this last week, gave me the notion,First off, its not candy corns, Second, I am an Insulin Junkie. Nice. Now it is what inspires me.

3 comments:

  1. I am really excited to see how the Lord is going to use your story. That's just it! WE ALL HAVE A STORY. I have the pleasure of getting to see you all the time and I am learning so much about Type 1 Diabetes. I am learning how to care for you and in the mean time, we get to have incredible conversations about Jesus and what He is doing in our lives. Your story, your LIFE story, is going to give others life. I am so proud of you, inspired by you and blessed beyond measure by your friendship. You are a life changer! A hot mess? nope! I love you BMT!

    Love,
    BMR

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  2. Hi,
    Oh my goodness! I was just reading Cjanes blog and right after I thought “I should actually post a comment on cjane and say that it bothers me when people act like they know about type 1 diabetes and they really don’t” I saw your comment!!!! :o) I would love to be your “insulin junkie friend” if you don’t mind. I would love to get to know you better and help you along your journey any way I can. I have had type 1 since I was 17 (my senior year in high school), (I just had my 7 year diabetes anniversary) and have been on the pump for 2 1/2 years. Thanks for sharing & listening to me! Much love & support to you! You can make it through! Lindsey makingbeautifulmemories@yahoo.com

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  3. I have had bad gestational diabetes in all my pregnancies, taking shots aorund 4x a day. My last pregnancy I got to use insulin pens and OMG!! Life was so much greater with them! So if you haven't been switched to pens ask about them! Also Walgreens has alcohol prep pads that have benzocaine in them so they take the initial "stick" out. They work great! Good luck!

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